Driving the Suzuki Swift Sport is much like dating a voluptuous short girl. You become an emotional explosion. Everything is an adrenalin rush in extreme and opposing directions.
One minute you are grinning from ear to ear as her performance is nothing but mind-blowing, and the next moment you are worried how long that relationship will last, as every boy wants her and she has curves in all the right places.
She is fun, she loves and laughs at your stupid jokes and you never know when next are you in trouble. Her attitude and manners are questionable like the brightness beam of a VW Polo, yet cannot keep your hands off her.
She can even predict your naughty playful thoughts, and before you even make a move, she has jumped almost out of reach, yet she too wants to play. The two of you get on like a house on fire on a windy day.
The interesting thing about people who ever ask me for car advice, is that looks supersede almost everything else. Fortunately for them, the Swift Sport has that department sorted out.
All around the ground hugging pocket rocket are carbon-look undertones. These spoilers make it look sporty, racy and somewhat aggressive, with the front and rear spoilers giving it a cheeky radiance. There are no blurred messages that pose ambiguous ideas about its intent and purpose.
An aggressive snout is like that of a predator actively sensing and sniffing the atmosphere for its next possible meal. A LED combination headlight with DRL flanks either side and these are super functional, being able to pierce through the darkest of nights. The demeanour of the Swift Sport is that of the alpha male hunter: ruthless, savage and uncompromising.
The side profile lines flow pleasantly from the headlight cluster, creating a side view that is easy and catchy on the eye. These culminate harmoniously at the rear LED cluster, after a subtle hint of the rear doors with recessed door handles. Just like a matured short chick, her hips are unapologetic, demand attention and could lead astray any a married man with low morals.
Her bums (boot) are not unnecessarily huge but adequate to haul weekend luggage or a few grocery items. It is the kind of bum that attracts your hand like light does to a moth, sometimes with disastrous results.
Once in the cabin the cloth racing seats hug you in ways you would appreciate. A racing steering wheel reminds you very quickly of your mission. A red back-lit analogue cluster channels your mind towards an imaginary racetrack.
The cluster also displays a whole of other technical information you would not otherwise find in average cars like; geo-forces, boost pressure, power and torque levels to mention a few. The Suzuki Swift Sport is like a little demon that calls you and dares you to break all the rules and render yourself ungovernable.
Remember that first day when you eventually gathered enough courage to ask a girl out? And she agreed, much to your disbelief? That is exactly how I felt like before even depressing the start button. But once all four cylinders were firing, I was ready to “race”.
Short chicks in my experience have the worst kind of attitude, understandably so seeing that they cannot pack all the other warm emotions into their tiny bodies. The Suzuki Swift Sport is also cheeky in the attitude department. It is always ready to prove a quick point, whether a dash to the next robot, run to the shops or a weekend getaway.
At the heart of this pocket rocket is a 1.4 turbo Boosterjet engine, the same powerplant fitted in the Vitara Brezza. With that much power (103 kW @ 5500 rpm) in such a tiny body, it is easy to understand the arrogance. A torque of 230 Nm at 3500 rpm also ensures that the Swift Sport is not just talk and no delivery, like the ruling party.
My test unit had a 6-speed automatic gearbox which ensured smooth but punchy delivery of power. On days when I felt a little naughtier there was an option to change gears manually via the finger pedals behind the racy steering wheel. The willingness (throttle response) of the Swift Sport to pounce forward at the touch of the pedal is on another level, thanks to the drive-by-wire system employed.
In all aspects of the drive, commanding this pocket rocket is pure fun and adrenalin.
My final thoughts:
Having driven the Suzuki Swift Sport and put it through its limits, I can almost understand why old men like young girls. For a whole week I was excited and besides myself, I felt younger and awake and wanted nothing but tarmac with plenty curves. I felt alive.
Being in such a happy and racy space for the week, I could not help but wonder what else in this class could possibly intimidate the Swift Sport.
The Peugeot 208 1.2 GT (96 kW and 230 Nm) and the Opel Astra 1.4T Edition priced at M326 000 and M360 000 respectively, might come close. But, in my honest opinion they will never match the reliability, practicality and resale value of our Japanese pocket rocket.
That said, not all short chicks are horrible to deal with, some are from decent families, background, culture and tradition. The Suzuki Swift Sport, priced at M349 900, is one such short chick.