Partner obsession: who out do the other?

’MAPALO NKHELOANE

MASERU: Women are considered to be very obsessive and intense beings especially when in relationships and men are obvious victims to the character.

While their intentions may be good in so doing, men find the character rather annoying as it denies them freedom or time to themselves.

Research however, shows that women are naturally devastated by failing relationships thus their intense and obsessive behaving in relationships sometimes.

It is also said that men and women are obsessive at some point just that their obsession shows in different scenarios.

Men get obsessed before they land a partner while women get obsessed after they find one.

Basotho women are not exceptions.

A 25-year-old Mats’eliso Teisa emphasises that women usually take longer to get emotionally involved but once they pass the verge they become deeply hooked.

Teisa says it is when they have invested emotions into a relationship that the intense character kicks in, sometimes without them even realising.

“Women are naturally people who are too much in everything. With women, warm is a strange term; they are either cold or hot. They do everything with passion and this is why even when they hate they do it with passion so the same thing goes for when they love someone, in this instance a male partner,” Teisa says.

She continues, “Frankly, all women are like that; some are just good at hiding or containing their intensity because well they do not want to come across as desperate. I wish men would come to terms with how we basically are and try to catch up with us or at least meet us halfway, that way life would be simple. Or if it was possible I was going to suggest that women date each other because we would understand one another since we have a lot in common but hey that cannot happen.”

30-year-old Thabiso Kome corroborates to the idea that women are indeed very intense people.

He says women who possess such character are mostly modern ones and therefore he suspects that technology plays a huge role.

“Communicating with your partner way back in the days was a hustle because phones were not as common to people as they are now. Some couples would go as far as up to a week without communicating and their relationship would still be just fine. Our fathers used to work in South Africa and saw their wives once in three months and they would be fine with it. It is a different case altogether now because women these days do not give us time to breathe. If it is not endless texts, it is calls and what they do not know is that too much of anything is bad,” Kome says.